Thursday, May 2, 2013

About The CME Conference!

Long story short, the bariatric team at the hospital where I had surgery almost 2 years ago has nagged me about coming to support groups and being on the committee and what not, but I never can because they're always on days I can't come and I live farther away than most the people that go. Maybe once I have a car that will be different, but for the time being, I'm kind of stuck.. Haha.

So an opportunity came up for this conference that they have once a year, and they asked me to be on a patient panel.. and I managed to work out a ride, so I was able to!

The purpose of the conference was to teach other health care professionals about the benefits of weight loss surgery for teenagers.. The patient panel was basically for patients to give their perspective on it, and to answer any questions anyone had about how it was for us (and our parents, as well!).

(I've posted some pictures on my Facebook page, you can check them out here! I wish I had gotten more, haha.)

My friend Sydney who had surgery almost a year after me, well, she's someone I mentored through the program. I actually met her at one of her pre-op appointments, when I was about 6 weeks post op.. She was in the hospital during the panel due to treatments for a pseudo-tumor.. But she managed to get out of her room for awhile to come do the panel as well! Along with two girls named Cari and Anesha. - I had met Cari at the one support group I went to last summer, and this was the first time I had met Anesha! However we had talked online before, through the Facebook support group page that the team had set up for patients pre and post op. (:

We were told to get there at 11:30-12 but we weren't really needed until 1:30 so we just hung out for awhile, got our nametags, ate lunch, and went over the list of questions we were given as a basis for what we were going to be asked.. Sydney was smart and wrote down all her answers, haha. I just wrote down some notes, the other two girls winged it..

I was really nervous.. Despite how well-spoken I may seem, I have some serious anxiety issues when it comes to speaking,.. I'm terrible at holding conversations, answering questions, asking questions, etc.. So it was a real stretch for me to agree to do, and actually go through with, this. I nudged Sydney a few times during the panel because I was shaking really bad..

I don't like words being put in my mouth, and I don't like not being able to explain things well.. I like writing because I'm able to think about what I"m going to say before I type it, and you always have the option to backspace/delete and re type what you want to say.. You don't have that option when you're doing something like this. So I'm really glad it went as well as it did, or I'd probably still be beating myself up over it.. haha.

However, the panel wen't really smoothly. I was luckily last to go.. They asked one person, then the next person, then the next person, then me, the same question then just repeated over and over again for like 10 questions, then the surgeon (Dr. Inge) had opened it up so anyone watching could ask questions.. So we took a few of those questions and whoever wanted to answer, could.. And then Payal (our Social Worker who was asking the questions from the list) asked a few more, but then we ran out of time..

It only took about 40 minutes or so, and was a lot less stressful once I got in the hang of things. Normally when I'm really anxious my blood pressure sky rockets and my face and chest and arms get really flushed.. The the flush/blushing didn't happen this time though, so I was really happy.

I answered all the questions the way I wanted to for the most part.. Sure there was more I could have added that I wish I did, but I didn't freeze up or anything so I was pretty pleased with myself. Haha.

I didn't eat lunch with everyone else before hand because I felt sick to my stomach because I was so nervous, so after talking to some of the surgeons there and saying hi to my dietitian and a few other people, my mom and I left and were going to go to Olive Garden... Nope. The one we were going to go to was shut down. Then we decided Outback Steakhouse. Nope. They were shut down too! So we ended up going to Long-Horn Steakhouse.. and it was freaking delicious. I don't go out to dinner much anymore, let alone anywhere that costs more than 8-9 bucks for a meal. I kind of feel like it's a waste because I can't eat it all and what not, so I don't like wasting money. However! It was worth it. It was so good!

And that's basically it.. I'm really glad I decided to take part in it, I got to talk to a lot of people and (hopefully!) help some people understand what the process was like for me and how it can be beneficial for others.

I certainly sometimes have my fair share of doubt, wondering if the surgery was the best idea or if in the long run it was the best decision for me, personally.. but it has helped so many people, and just because I get frustrated doesn't mean it didn't help me.. It may have just helped me less than it does other people, and I'm okay with this, because it's still done a lot.

I answered all the questions from the panel in my last post (here!) in case anyone is curious.

I hope everyone's having an amazing day, and I'll update again soon!! :D

-Ashley<3(: