I've realized that when making such a huge life change, whether it be surgery or other health issues or even not health related.. a break up/divorce, moving, switching schools, anything.. It's really important to take care of yourself.. Not just eating right and exercising.
Along this journey I've met a lot of people that I probably would have never met, otherwise. Not just people from a support group or certain doctors.. But real friends. I've always had issues making friends.. But when I became confident in my doctors helping me get healthy, I became more confident in myself.. I've found myself doing things I never thought I'd do before.. Or things I wanted to do, but couldn't.
I lost a lot of friends over this journey.. But I've gained so many more, and they don't even realize that most my life has revolved around this kind of stuff.. They take me at face value. For me.
It's an amazing feeling.
Not just that, but I've started taking better care of myself.. I've always had social anxiety issues. But I've been applying for jobs, doing volunteer work, and all sorts of stuff...I would always sleep in the living room on the couch because I felt claustrophobic in my room. I had no motivation to clean it, ever. You couldn't walk 2 feet into it without tripping and risking death.. I cleaned it. I have a bed in there now (I didn't before.. my friend had broke it and i never put a new one in.)
I don't live on the computer anymore. I've been lazy and put off getting my license, but I'm almost finished with drivers ed. (:
It's just.. It's an overall positive thing, and I want everyone to experience it. It's an amazing thing.
No matter what big change you're going through, whether it be surgery/health stuff like mine, or a divorce/breakup, or switching schools.. or anything.. Remember to take care of yourself. If you get yourself stuck in a rut, you can get yourself out.
I've quit spending money on clothes. It's not worth it. I wear baggy clothes, and I go to concerts. I enjoy creating memories for myself because I blocked so much of my life out.. I call up old friends, go to an arcade.. go on a late night run to Sonic just to catch up with someone.. This is the first real summer I think I've ever had... That wasn't revolved around my health,.. or where I wasn't too depressed to leave the house.
There's so much more... Just.. I had an amazing summer. It was the first time I've really had to take care of myself and just have a good time. If you don't find things to make yourself happy, you won't be happy. Do things you enjoy. Life is short!
I guess the point of this is.... I'm healthier. I'm still in the process of losing weight but... To be honest..? I've only weighed myself maybe 3 or 4 times this summer, vs every week.. My weight doesn't define me and my life doesn't revolve around it. Of course it's still a huge goal of mine to continue losing weight, but there is more to my life than just that. My quality of life is so much better.. not only did I take it into my own hands to get physically healthier by having this surgery.. But I took it into my own hands to not be a hermit. To not hide in my room anymore. To enjoy life. I'm tired of wasting time.
It's an extremely empowering feeling knowing that you've done so much for yourself.. That you've changed so much.. When you realize how far you've come..
No matter what change you're dealing with in your life, remember to take care of yourself.. and make yourself happy. This is the only life you get. Make the most of it.
Have a great day!!
-Ashley.
Here are some pictures from my summer, things I've done.. Things I'll never forget. (Warning: Lots of pictures.. Making this post a lot longer than necessary.)
bowling. (:
Went to the pool a TON this summer.. I got a tan for the first time since i was like 12.. haha
Went to the Lego store in Cincinnati for my brothers 9th birthday. (:
Made home-made cherry pie (and lots of other stuff) for the 4th of July. I bake a lot.. ha ha
Went to coney island (waterpark/amusementpark) on my dads week off! went canoeing for the first time in years.. I've always loved it. <3 haha
warped tour!!!! I was going to use a picture of one of my favorite bands but this one kind of helps you visualize just how huge it was.. and this was only 1 of the 8 or 9 stages.. :P
went fishing. (: i didn't catch anything but 2/3 of my brothers did!
I kind of have a thing for campfires.. :P I had to have at least 6 or 7 this summer..
Went to MI to see a few of my favorite bands.. Eyes on the sky, at long last, paradise fears, ashland high (trace cyrus.. yes, mileys brother.) and FTSK.
Here's my picture with Trace. He was so sweet. I got pictures with pretty much every other person there too but this picture list is already long as-is.. add me on facebook if you wanna see the rest, haha.
Went to an arcade place with one of my best friends for my 17th birthday.. I've known her since i was 5. Haven't seen her much the past few years until recently.. reconnecting with old friends is an amazing thing.
Saw Paradise Fears for the 3rd time this year.. at a house party they did in Grafton, OH. These 6 guys (and the friends i've made through them) are the only people who have left me with any hope in the human race. They are some of the most accepting people I have ever met.. I couldn't be more thrilled that I've got to spend as much time with them as I have. (:
This is my picture with Marcus (the bassist in PF). We (me and like 15 other people) sat and talked with them all for like 4 hours around a bonfire.. It was an amazing night. Too many pictures to post at once, though. This was honestly a night I'll never forget.. I made a bunch of new friends (that i don't want to post pictures of.. I don't know if they'd be cool with it.) that i would have never met otherwise.. I've only known them a week but i feel as if I've known them my entire life.. Music brings people together in an amazing way.. I love it.
Me & Tara. The girl I typically go to all these concerts with. (: it's all smokey because of the bonfire. haha.
Went to a big sunflower patch to take some senior pictures for my friend, because her photographer wasn't available.. we ended up setting a timer and taking some of both of us.. (:
All in all my summer was absolutely amazing.. This wasn't even half of what I wanted to post but this is already way too long as is so I'm going to shut up now..
Before I go? That band I keep seing? Paradise Fears? They did a cover of a song by Gym Class Heroes that is kind of amazing... their originals are fantastic but the video for this cover... you should watch it.. all the way through. Seriously.. It will give you hope in humanity.
Alright! Bye (:
