conversations

Today my friend instant messaged me. I had told her I was having weight loss surgery, a couple months ago. She didnt seem very supportive at first, because her mom had the RNY and things didnt go all that well.. Physically I believe her moms fine, but her mom just changed after surgery so shes not fond of it. now she seems supportive, but This kinda surprized me. No one has really asked me anything about it. People have told me their opinions and that they think its wrong. But she genuinley seemed to be curious. I didnt mind talking about it at all.. I mean, I have this blog right? Haha. Its just no one really has seemed to understand it, in real life. Shes taken an interest. I'm glad I feel liek I can talk to her about it now. Its not so awkward. (:



My Friend: I have a question o.o

ashleyellen1637: yeah?
 My Friend: I don't wanna sound weird or a dick anything with it in some way; but I kind of curious. Hah

 ashleyellen1637: alright o.o about what?
My friend: Your surgury Aha

ashleyellen1637: Lol alright, whats the question?
My Friend: Haha; you know after you lose all the weight how there will still be the extra skin left o.o

 ashleyellen1637: yup
My Friend: Are you going to have surgury to get rid of it or no?

ashleyellen1637: It depends how bad it is.. For younger people theres still a chance it'll go back. your skins elasticity or whatever isnt completely gone, like when you're older. But at the place i'm having the surgery, they offer free plastic surgery 18months after surgery if needed. So if i need it, then yeah I probably will.
My Friend:

Ohh, alright. Aha. I didn't want to sound like a dick in a way somehow asking it. I think it's great that you're having it done<3 But I know my moms self concious cause she didn't get the skin removed but I never saw how it looks if you get it removed. I'm curious. Aha

ashleyellen1637: Haha no you're not, it's fine. Ive met a few kids that already had the surgery in the same program i'm in and some of them didnt need plastic surgery and they look great. So idk if i'll need it or not. But yeah, haha.
My Friend:

Aha ohh, I got it. I wish I could do that:|

 ashleyellen1637: Haha yeah.. Do you really think you could need it? i mean, idk, but your mom had it.. if you think you could need it you should ask her about it.
My Friend: I mean, I just wish. Running sucks ass.

ashleyellen1637: Haha yeah it does.. ;l
 ashleyellen1637: I didnt mind it before. but now that im 100+lbs overweight, its hard.
 My Friend:

Can I ask how much you weigh? If it doesn't bother you. I feel like a dick asking

ashleyellen1637: Lmao you're not a dick. and i'm ehh around 250ish now.. Before I started pre-op stuff i was almost 280, like, back in january.
 My Friend:

Ohh, what kind of preop stuff?

 ashleyellen1637: Diet changes. High protein, low carb, no soda, nothing with much sugar. 5 small meals a day instead of 3 bigger ones. a few weeks from now i start pretty much all protein shakes except for one under 400 caloire meal a day. its really strict.. but it works. lol.
 ashleyellen1637: they do it so your livers not enlarged during surgery soi ts easier for the surgeon to get around.
 My Friend:

Aha damn. I'm not good with watching for low carbs and low calorie stuff. I mean, I feel smaller and better about myself; but I've only dropped like 3lbs

 ashleyellen1637: Every little bit counts.. when i see one or 2 pounds down i feel ecstatic. haha-- Cause i'm insulin resistance ive had to watch carbs and sugar and calories and fat since i was like... 3. Now its just a lot more strict ;l lmao. its second nature to me. i dont eat anything without looking at nutrition shit ;o it slike ocd ;l lmao
My Friend: I mean, I

My Friend:

I mean, I'm like 195ish. I'm gaining weight but losing inches 0_o

ashleyellen1637: Haha that's happened to me before. the weight just re-distributed itself to like my chest or my legs then my waiste got smaller. -- i cannot understand how that happens to save my life. but it does. lmao
My Friend: But my legs are smaller, my tummy is smaller and my boobs are the same sizeee

 My Friend: ;o

ashleyellen1637: your face, arms, ankles, neck, shoulders, all of those can accumulate it too. idk. if it didnt re-distribute, your magic. ;o
 ashleyellen1637: xD
 My Friend:

I'm thinner everywhere 0_o I mean I'm not gaining weight since I've started running again and shit. But since begining of freshman year, I've gained weight but got smaller.

 My Friend:

I went from needing a size 18 dress and it was tight, to now I tried on a 16 today and it was loose

 ashleyellen1637: Ohhhh well that makes more sense now. lol. well yeah if youve lost of course your gonna be smaller. and thats awesome (:
 My Friend: Aha; I feel better and smaller but ughhh -.-

 ashleyellen1637: haha theres more you can do besides running if you hate it that much. I always hated runnign unless i was playing soccer. lol
 My Friend:

I hate running but it's a good stress reliever too and I feel healthier when I do

ashleyellen1637: Any form of exersize makes you feel better cause it releases 'happy chemicals' in your head. haha. and yeah, it is. I wish i could run |: strictly because i miss playing soccer. I had to quit soccer when i was 13 cause i physically couldnt play anymore. it sucked ;l
 My friend:

Aha I've played soccor, softball, basketball, football, and I was a cheerleader and I swam. I've done it all but now I'm too fat to playy

 ashleyellen1637: Ugh I know what you mean. Soccer, Softball, Volleyball, basketball, football, swimming, tennis, dance, skateboarding.. I havent ridden a bike in 3 years. I honestly think if i tried to get on one id fall on my ass cause i dont remember how to ride one. lmao. i'm scared to exersize, honestly.. do you know what cardiomyopothy is?
 My Friend: Oh, I did volleyball, and tennis too but not for long. And I took dance most of my life. I'm going to start again. And you won't fall riding a bike Ash, you can't forget. Haha

 My Friend: And, I dont know

My Friend: Hey, I gotta go. Text me if you want<3

My Friend: Byebye

^^^
I ended up texting her and talking to her more about it all. and explaining cardiomyopothy and how part of my heart is enlarged already and how it scares me to exersize because of it.. My blood pressure issues and stuff like that.

It honestly felt good tot alk to it not to my mom or one of my moms friends that her big mouth blabs everything to. If you dn't, i suggest finding someone you can talk to aabout it.. Someone that may understand or has a better chance of it. i consider myself lucky i at least have her. (: aha.

i'll post more blogs later <3 i've been really sick this past week so i havent been on the computer much. I'll update more for sure (:

have a good day <3

-Ashley.

Interesting exersize ideas.

I know its hard to motivate yourself to work out. Especially if you can't find a sport you like or a routine that works for you. heres a few ideas of things maybe you havent tried.

• Just Dance Videogames
• Dance Dance Revolution Videogame
• HipHop abs
• Playing Tennis
• Swimming Laps
• Just walking in a pool.
• Try to learn a new dance routine. Look up 'dance tutorial' on youtube.

If you don't have a lot of time on your hands, you could try a few of these:

• Inbetween commerical breaks, do jumping jacks or jog in place.. you could even jog in place while watching part of a tv show.
• Park farther away from the store or office or wherever you drive to.. take a far away spot in the parking lot.
• Take the stairs instead of the elevator.
• If you work in an office setting, once an hour take 5 minutes to stretch and walk around the floor a bit before getting back to work.

If you wanna hang out with friends, instead of going to a movie or dinner, suggest wakling around the mall or walking up to a smoothie cafe or somthing, rather than somewhere where you sit down and just accumulate calories.

Just a few ideas, if i come up with more i'll post them. (: Every little bit counts. Try to stay active.

<3
Ashley.

www.twitter.com/justashley1637
www.youtube.com/justashley1637
www.obesityhelp.com/member/ashleyellen1637
ashleyellen1637@aol.com


random picture:


It's been raining alot lately.. I love thunderstorms, but plain rain is annoying.. I want to go to the pool, but its supposed to rain alll weeeek. I wanna move to pheonix. -.- lol.

Just a word for the parents of overweight kids/teenagers..

I know it can be hard.. Seeing your kid go through things you may have gone through, or you know someone that has, or just the issues with being overweight.. Bullying, issues with finding clothes that fit, etc.. You probably want to help them in any way that you can.. ‘Tough Love’ some people call it.. Restricting them and forcing them to exersize and what not.. I know you mean well.. But I promise you It will only worsen things in the long run.. Maybe not physical health, but mentally.. It can hurt. It definatley will strain your relationship with your son/daughter(s) if they don’t understand why.. if they don’t want to get better themselves, nothing can make them.

When I was little, I had to start dieting and exersizing.. No other kid did.. I went to a private school.. I got made fun of horribly cause of my weight. I told my mom a lot of it.. But not all.. I haven’t told half the counselors I’ve had since, about some of my.. encounters with certain people. Its just something id rather not share.

I can easily say me and my mom don’t have the best relationship.. Lots of things have built up since, but it definatley started with me resenting her when I was younger.. She woud lock cuppords.. If I didn’t take my bloodsugar at the exact time she wanted or my pills, she would hold me down and force the needle on me. She would pull me away from friends or activities to do aerobics, because regular playing outside or sports wasn’t enough for a kid with Insulin Resistance..

I realize all of that now.. how important it was that she did all of that.. I would be so much worse off if I hadn’t been forced into all of that.. But it doesn’t change the fact I was never ‘normal’.. What is normal? I don’t know. There is no ‘normal’. When I say normal, I mean.. I never fit in. I was always the loner, something was always different about me compared to someone else. And growing up in such a small environment (small neighborhood, everyone knew everyone, small school, etc etc etc…), didn’t help.. everyone is different, but in that situation, I seemed like the odd one out.

No matter how many sports I played or how much time I spent swimming or playing outside.. It was never enough.. I specifically remember one time my family was spending all day at the pool, and my mom convinced the manager to block off a lane during adult swim so she coud make me swim like 15 or 20 laps.. Kids from my school were there.. It was humiliating trying to explain to the girls that bullied me my whole life, why I was swimming laps during adult swim.. And parents would come up nd ask, or lifeguards, or whatever.. It was hell. Honestly..

My whole point with this post is… You can’t win.. You may try to force your kid to dow aht you think/know is right for them.. But in the end, theres still a chance you’re wrong.. And even if your not, if youre too forceful about it, beware the long term psychological damage it can have..

My mom told me a few months ago how she was worried when she locked cuppords and stuff that I would grow up and be anorexic because when iw as younger I was only allowed toe at at certain times and was taught ‘food is bad’ etc.. I definatley went through a period where I had an eating disorder.. but after seeing a different counselor and seeing different doctors that was taken care of.. –but I don’t think tht had anything to do with my mom.. that hd to do with me being fed up with no amount of diet and exersize ever really working for me.. ever..

Don’t try to teach your kids.. They wont listen! I’m telling you this first hand.. I mean you can try, but it most likely wont work.. Let them have time alone with their doctors and ask doctors to talk to them about whats going on.. Let them feel like they have some control. Have them do research and look up stuff.. try to get them interested in their health. Don’t force it upon them. Cause ya gotta face it.. the day they turn 18 they’re on their own…  and they may just want to rebel more that very second and pig out and what not and anything you tried to force upon them will just be a waste of time and effort, and in the long run probably hurt them more.

You have to let them come to the conclusion themselves. And when they really realize whats going on, and what they want out of life, and whats important to them.. They’ll make the right decisions for them. You can’t protect them forever.

Personally, I would have never come to this realization if I wasn’t forced upon it on my own..  With my parents having their issues and I lost a LOT of friends over periods of depression.. Not that I had very many to begin with.. But still.. When I went to a doctor and they showed me the charts.. they showed me what was going on.. I had known all of this. I knew all of this was going to happen at one point or another. I knew I was going to be in early stages of cardiomyopathy and right on the line of type 2 and hypertension and what not..  But it had never been real to me.. it had just been my mom wanting to get her way and force it all upon me and make my life miserable, until the moment I realize I was fucking screwed and needed to get all this weight off.

I know you all want what’s best for your kids.. But you need to let them come to the realization themselves. Don’t single them out. If you want to go to extremes and lock cuppords and what not, don’t just do it for that one kid.. do it for all of them. If he’she isn’t allowed cookies, no one else should be allowed either. You have to let them make the decisions on their own. They need to build up the willpower and learn on their own, or it wont continue. They have to find their own motivation.

I know. I’m 15 and I’m saying this. I’m not a mom, I wont know until I am, blahblahblah. But I know whats worked for me, and a few other people I’ve talked to that have it.. and doctors even recognize no diet or exersize will work unless the person is motivated to make it work.. forcing your kid wont motivate them to do anything but rebel against you.

I hope this kinda gave some parents some insight.. and whatever you do, NEVER make your 6 year old do Richard simmons sweatin’ to the oldies tapes.. ever.. under no circumstances is that okay. Trust me. From personal experiences. Haha. alright. Byeee.

<3

-Ashley.

www.twitter.com/justashley1637 (beware. Demilovato obessed.)

www.youtube.com/justashley1637

www.obesityhelp.com/member/ashleyellen1637

ashleyellen1637@aol.com

Have a nice day. (:

So, I was going through my Facebook photo albums today..

I love taking pictures.. Unless i'm taking a picture of myself, i'm usually not in pictures, im the one taking them. I kinda want that to change.. But thats beside the point..

Back in the fall doctors were having me get tested for Cushings Syndrome. I had a lot of symptomes of it and what not. So i did a 24 hour urine collection and some blood work.. Turns out i didnt, and they later diagnosed me with pcos.. But i looked over my facebook pictures with my parents back then realizing how much i had changed in such a short period of time.. even from like august2010 - october2010, i looked so much different.. gained a lot of weight, 'moon face', buffalo bump between my shoulderblades on my back, losing more hair, etc.. my hormone levels were messed up.

I was doing that again today Just going through the years.. I have them organized by year. I got my facebook in 2009. I have albums 'Before 2008', '2008', '2009', '2010 part 1', 2010 part 2', and '2011' so far. I realized how much I've changed with how i have felt about myself.. I went through kind of a 'fuck the world' emo stage when i was 13.. Back when i quit soccer because i physically couldnt play anymre.. I was just coming out of a tomboy phase.. I've gone through a lot of 'phases'. I was a super girly little girl.. Once i hit 10 iw as a super tomboy for two years.. would never even think about wearing a bra or a girly tshirt, god forbid a skirt or a pair of earrings!.. I hit 13, i was emo. that was kinda when i started playing guitar too and really getting into music.. but i had my moments. I went through John Casablancas modeling and career center for modeling and acting classes.. Could have ended up signed to mtm, but i didnt end up doing it.. I had too much stress gonig on with my family. -- But yeah. then i went to really like rocker/punk-ish.. partly for a guy i liked.. haha. other just trying to rebel against my family.. piss my parents off. i dyed my hair alot and wore a lot of makeup.

Ive always worn a lot of makeup.. Starting when i was like 4 in dance recitals.. but that was it.. i started wearing every day in like ny second time ni 7th grade, and 8th grade.. when i was 13/14. I had makeup classes at JC, so i wasnt bad at applying it.. I look back at these pictures and seriously like.. my skin looked flawless. and i realize how much work i had put into that. the smokey eye, red lips, balancing it out, not both at once.. different colored eyeliner, eyeshadows.. I"m seriously thinking about entering cosmetology school.. lol. Ive also had a lot of different haircuts.. super long, bobbed, bangs, side bangs, tons of layers,  short 'emo' haircut that covered half my face witha  bunch of layers.. Now its kinda long and i have some sidebangs. I'm growing it out for locks of love.

ANYWAY, my point... Now that i know i'm having this surgery.. I've been losing weight on my own just changing my eating patterns in a way I never have before.. I havent lost a lot, but 20 somthing pounds.. i finally found a routine that keeps my skin looking halfway decent... I havent been wearing as much makeup lately. at all.

My friend tara used to make fun of me cause i had a makeup case bigger than the one in the hannah montana movie.. And not al my makeup fits in it. i still do, cause i change it up alot.. i have a shitload of makeup! but i dont use it as much.. I'm actually able to find random features i like about myself now.. My long (annoying) eyelashes. my eyes that ust happen to change colors like all the time. my nails can grow super long before they break off. stupid things like that.

The smallset weight loss can make someone feel so much better about themselves.. I dont think untill this year, i have lost weight.. since i was like 12. It feels amazing! Set small goals for yourself..

I know the other day at my appointment the social worker asked me what size i would like to get down to.. ow much weight i would like to lose, or what my goal weight is.. and to be honest?

Id liek to get down to a normal bmi.. which for my hiehg tis 140 somthing at the highest.

But, id be happy at anything under 200.. really. I remember how i looked when i was under 200.. I dont want to get down to a size 2! i'd be happy at a 14!

The main goal i want out of this, besides being healthier? Is to play soccer again.. I had to give up soccer when i physically couldnt play anymore.. I miss it so much. I played select.. where i had to try out to be on the team. and i still made it,e ven though i was ridiculousy overweight! I was good.. That is one thing i can actually admit i was good at.. I used to want to play soccer all through highschool and maybe go to college and play tehre too.. Thats not necesarily somthing I want anymore, ive explored my options for collge.. But soccer was my life.. literally.. for 10 years. I miss it.. Sometimes i think i would be so much happier if i never quit. I want to play again. and the first thing i do once i get under 200 lbs? Is try out again. I miss the team.. I miss playing.. I regret quitting, but i know i couldnt have continued.. i would have had a heart attack playing.. i could feel my heart through my chest.. couldnt run very fast.. i wouldnt have made it the next year cause i was slow.. but i love the game.. Its the only sport i enjoy watching and playing.

My whole point with this long post? is set realistic goals for yourself.. surgery or not! It will feel great when you achieve them quicker.. You can set more, along the way.. but start with smaller goals.

"If you really want to do somthing, you'll do it. If you don't, you'll find an excuse."

<3

~Ashley.

www.youtube.com/justashley1637
www.twitter.com/justashley1637 (beware.. huge demi lovato fan.. lol. #StayStrong.)
www.obesityhelp.com/member/ashleyellen1637

If you have any questions or suggestions youd like me to write about, or anything else, feel free to email me! ashleyellen1637@aol.com (:

Have a great day! Oh, and Happy Fathers Day to all you dads out there.. All the ones that have stepped up to the plate in rough times, and stayed there for their families.. Support, no matter in what form, is huge and means alot. Times are rough, but don't give up. ever. This is me and my dad on my first fathers day.. I was like 10 months old, aha. (: its inside a mini radio thing.

Long day at the hospital, and Update.

This was pretty much my day.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/justashley1637/sets/72157626859490203/

EKG/ECO, then meeting with nurse, adolecent medicine dr, dietitian, and social worker.. then i had a pulmonary appt. at 2, and we are calling on monday to schedule a sleep study.

The nurse said if everything goes right with insurance on the final letter they send out the day after my appt in july (July 21st), they usually respond quickly (i was pre-approved.. just final confirmation letter). and it should be within a couple weeks after the finall approval. leading into mid august to early september.. Which is good, because we lose medicaid in october.. lol.

I was freaking out over gaining a few pouds, but i didnt know what my exact weight was last time i was there.. which was like 255. i went down to 248, but back up to 255 before the appt. since i wasnt on metformin.. but since they didnt have documentation of the 248,its not a big deal. thank god.

I've been feeling pretty crappy lately.. med changes are really affecting me. but oh well. i should get used to that all by now.

---------------------------------

Had a pretty big blow up with my brother the other night.. I was tired, iw as at the hospital all day and had just gotten home.. hes overweight.. not as big as i am, but hes overweight. his bmi is like 30.9. but he plays a lot of sports.. He doesnt understand the hell i've gone through growing up.. How active i was, but i still had to do a solid hour of aerobic exersize and diet and all this stuff.. he compulsivley overeats and thinks that the stop&start sports he plays, really cancels that all out.. which it doesnt. and hes like 'wella t least i dont ahve to have surgery to lose weight' when in reality, he willif he doesnt start changing his ways.. hes about where i was at his age, but i was a bit shorter.. hes taller than me now. hes 12. I dont know. it resulted in a big argument and lots of fighting and just... yeah. it wasnt good. Hes a little egotastic 6th grader who thinks eh knows everything.. when reality crashes down on him, we'll see how well he deals with it.

-------------

blah. im still tired. i just got one of my smoothies from tropical smoothie <3 yum. although its raining and gloomy, the smoothie still tastes justa s good as when its sunny and im on my way to the pool, haha.

I'll do some more informational updates later. this is kinda just a filler. (: thanks for checking out my blog, everyone.


<3 Ashley.
www.obesityhelp.com/member/ashleyellen1637
www.twitter.com/justashley1637 (beware. i'm demi lovato obessed. lots of tweets about her. haha)
www.youtube.com/justashley1637
ashleyellen1637@aol.com

Have a great day. (:

Having an appt. tomorrow.

ekg/eco, pulmonary, then meeting with the team.. surgeon/dietitian/nurse/doctor/psych/etc...

im asuming its gonna be a combination of all of them, anyway. it has been the last 2 meetings.

One more month after this then my surgery can be scheduled. wooh! (:

I've been going kinda crazy looking at all my options the past two days.. Really. i thought i was losing it,but im aightt (:.

I got a notebook today. just a little one that im writing down things in.. like what i need to get pre-op/post-op, different protein shakes i try that i like, things to remember, questions for doctors, stuff like that.

lots of questions..

I've been obesityhelp.org a LOT lately, getting peoples opinions. I'm glad things are going as well as they are so far. I just really hope me gaining 2 pounds didnt mess anything up..

I gained 2 pounds a week or so ago cause i had to be off metformin for 10 days before my glucose test that i had on friday.. i gained the 2 pounds then.. /:

I've been trying to lose them sicnei got back on the metformin but it hasnt happened yet. i dont think it has, anyway. my scale isn't worth crap.

I got out my binder and have been reading more and more and more and more. lots of information ive been saving.

i'll probably bring my laptop tomorrow, and update fromthere. i'm probably gonna have a break in the day between the main appt and the pulmonary appt.

blahhhh. i dont' know what else to say, just a random update. i'll post more sensible things later.

byeee<3
(:

youtube.com/justashley1637
obesityhelp.org/member/ashleyellen1637
twitter.com/justashley1637
ashleyellen1637@aol.com

Second thoughts..

I havent scheduled the surgery date yet.. I probably wont get it scheduled till mid/end of July. I'm glad I have a month or so to think things through before getting the date set..

I've been a research maniac the past few months.. and I'm just now finding out about some options I didn't know about.. The DuoDenal switch is really making me think here.. I want to have the VSG. My mom wants that for me too. But I'm realizing restriction alone probably won't help my metabolic issues, as much as a malabsorbtion procedure could.. but i'm not 100% sure. On obesity help ive gotten a lot of differnt peoples opinions on different procedues.. Most seem to reccomend RNY or DS, given the problems I have.. And the few that dont reccomend it, dont because mal absorbtion could be hard given my age... I realize I'm 15.. I don't want to be on a strict vitamin regimen my whole life. Who does? But i'd much rather deal with that, than with the issues my obesity causes.. I know i can stick to taking the pills.. Ive done it on and off since i was 8 or 9.. maybe even a bit younger. I'm already on some vitamins now, pre-op.

I hate that ive only met with my surgeon once, and i only have one appt. a month.. It's not enough for me to get the information i need.

I would take more time, but the thing is, the insurance that is covering my surgery i lose in october! I don't have enough time to look into other places.. Cincinnati Childrens was the first and only place I've gotten a refferal to, and I didn't think much of it.. Now I'm realizing how many other options there are and Im extremely frustrated I don't have the time to look into it all! I don't want to make a mistake.

If I have the VSG, what happens if i lose somew eight, but not all the weight that i need to, and then i dont qualify for a revision to DS?

I don't want the RNY... I really don't.. I'd do it if it was my only option. But from what ive seen, the weight comes off ridiculously fast.. With any surgery weight comes off farily fast.. But I dont want to lose a bunch of weight.. My goal right now is to lose 110 lbs.. I don't care if that takes 2 years.. I just desperatley need a jump start. i need help to lose it cause clearly I can't do it on my own.

I understand my conditions.. But most of it all is just done with my own research.. I see doctors once every couple months, i go to a few.. But they never explain things very well.. Its just frustrating.

I have two insurances.. United Health Care won't cover me for it.. I'm not sure if its because i'm under 18 or if its my dads policy.. But they just wont. Caresource/Medicaid however will! But we lose caresource in october! So i'm kind of in a rush because once i lose it i wont be able to have anything done till I'm 16.. I dont want to rush into things.. But i dont want to lose my chance either..

Ugh. This is overwhelming. I want to get a second opinion from another bariatric clinic but i dont know if i can without a refferal.. I dont know if insurance will cover it.. I was talking to a nurse and they said that caresource understands the cincinnati chidlrens bariatrics program well, they've ahd a lot of people go through it with caresource so they respond pretty quickly and are quick to agree to it all and such.. Thats why i was so happy. But now i dont know if it would be that simple with a different clinic.

Ugh!!!!!!! This is seriously frustrating. I don't want the weight to come off ridiculously fast.. I'm doing everything at all possible to avoid ridiculous amounts of loose skin after surgery... i'm currently even doing weights and resistance stuff along with some aerobics... (with no results, weight loss wise.. as usaul), and i'm looking into creams and compression garments and stuff for after surgery.. my skin has been stretched since i was little.. i'm really hoping it can go back to normal.. But i'm not gonna get my hopes TOO high..

Its just.. a lot to take in.. If all else fails, i'll just get the VSG because thats what everyone seems to want for me and go from there.. But i dont wan't to be disapointed if it doesnt treat my metabolic stuff, which is the whole reason i looked into surgery in the first place.. my health.


If anyone has any suggestions please please please message me on OH, Youtube, email, somthing.. I could really use some advice. Thanks. <3

-Ashley
twitter.com/justashley1637
obesityhelp.org/member/ashleyellen1637
youtube.com/justashley1637
ashleyellen1637@aol.com

VVVVVVV

on a side note.. I miss this little kid. I have three little brothers.. This is the youngest, Nolan. He's 7. He'll be 8 in july. Definatley the one i'm closest to. Its weird. I see him and i'm not as stressed. Just cause he thinks about things so plain and simple... He gets stuff.. hes too smart for his age.. He'll randomly blurt out about how his friends parents are divorcing and they shoudl quit fighting cause its gonna be over soon anyway, and things like that. its insane. But yeah. He needs to come home. He spent the night at his grandparents last night. /: haha. I have so many pictures of him.. He loves my camera |: lol.